All heroes have quirks. All of them. Full stop. No matter what story you’re reading the guy has a quirk. Even if they are somewhat annoying and one dimensional –Diggory I’m looking at your later career choices so there’s no use hiding in the corner and pretending I don’t see your Maybelline face with it’s extra special sparkles.
So I repeat—all heroes have quirks. Some have great quirks like a love of violin or the ability to cook decadent desserts (I recommend Brooke Moss’s Bittersweet if you want a smoking hot version of that kink) and some have some not so great quirks like trust issues, lothario ways or a subtle reliance on mind control – don’t ask I can’t ever get back the time I wasted on that particular novel. But in the end, all heroes like all men have quirks.
You may be thinking well duh, I knew that already Screwball Goddess. But today I found my favorite quirk in a man and I may eventually be stealing it for my books.
It’s a really simple quirk actually—I watched a man buy his wife exactly what she needed. Not jewelry or scratchy lingerie made out of dental floss coated in barbed wire. Nope, none of that. This man went out and bought his wife a pair of Injinji Performance socks.
If you’re not a runner– or even more specifically a member of the minimalist movement of running– you probably have no idea what these are except for basic black socks with toes. But if you are an endurance athlete or a minimalist runner—I’m starting to dip my toe into both with endurance running and triathlon training (check out my blog for my thoughts on THAT particular insanity)—then you know these suckers are the gold standard of what to wear when you want a little more protection on your toesies during long runs, especially if you’re in a minimalist shoe like a Fila Skeletoes or one of the Vibram FiveFingers models. Plus the grippy ones rock for yoga class.
Anyway, as a just because this guy went online and spent the money for his woman some special socks. Why? Because he thought she’d need them. That is it. The end. That’s all.
Her response? “Oh he always does that. That’s just the kind of guy he is. For my birthday he bought me a new pair of Zoomer Z2’s (swim fins for endurance training) and for Christmas he bought me a new pair of clipless pedals for my road bike and a new pair of cycle shoes because he saw mine were getting worn.”
You may be going okay Screwball, what’s the big deal? She needs it, he bought it. So what?
So here’s what. I watched this guy for the rest of the day and I noticed that he was doing it the whole time. It was hot out so off he ambles to get her some water. She doesn’t ask. He just goes and gets it because he recognizes that she’s starting to get hot. He’d lean over to occasionally rub her shoulders when they’d tense. It wasn’t just that this guy was practical it was that he was observant. That was his super special quirk—he knew his sigfig well enough to just know what she needed and took care of it, no questions, no theatrics, no comments needed. And the most important thing? This guy isn’t an endurance athlete. No triathlons. He will not be jumping into freezing water with us and thanking the gods of swimming for all that time with the zoomers in practice when our legs cramp from the water temps. He’s not going to be the one feeling the extra tread on her cycle shoes 23 miles in. This guy picked it all up because he LISTENED and he OBSERVED. And that is a quirk I think we all need to appreciate more and maybe try to cultivate in ourselves.
So that’s the Screwball Goddess’s words of wisdom to start your month off right. Any guy can mold himself a sixpack and pecs that would make women worldwide weep. What’s really special is a guy who takes the time to listen to you, pay attention to you, and then goes about helping you make your dreams no matter how big or small become a reality.
And maybe, if you want to get all philosophical about it we could apply the same lessons to ourselves: It’s the quirks in our character and our capacity to love that make us special not the size of our jeans and our bras. So today, while I’m sweating on the treadmill I’m going to keep reminding myself that being observant and appreciative of others is a quirk that I should be developing—even though my abs need serious work as well.
Bittersweet’s buy link on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Love-Knows-No-Bounds-ebook/dp/B007YLUWFQ/ref=sr_1_3?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1341091091&sr=1-3&keywords=brooke+moss
About Patricia Eimer
Wow, to have a hero like that! I hope she appreciates how rare that is and gives him the same attention! To be more observant and thoughtful and listen more is as admirable quirk for anyone to try to cultivate.
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Patricia Eimer Reply:
July 1st, 2012 at 11:44 am
I agree it was just amazing to watch this guy and realize that he’s just sort of that cool.
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I remember a time when this kind of anticipation of a man’s needs was not only expected of women — it was a her role. Or should I say duty. Men have come a long way, and I know quite a few who fit this mold. It’s a good quirk! And I agree it’s one we all need to cultivate as a loving gesture rather than a duty.
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Patricia Eimer Reply:
July 1st, 2012 at 7:54 pm
That’s exactly what I was thought about it being a loving gesture that we probably all need to work on — I know I do.
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Who IS this mystery man?! He’s a keeper.
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Patricia Eimer Reply:
July 1st, 2012 at 7:54 pm
One of my training buddy’s husbands. And the nice thing is– I think he might be rubbing off on mine.
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He sounds like a true treasure!
But he will do/give/be/fetch/carry anything I ask which I gues is better than a man who doesn’t listen and doesn’t do anything either.
My hubby is a terrible listener. I always joke that when I truly need him to listen to something I have to say I need to take my shirt off. Then I have his attention!
Playing with the hand I got dealt
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Harking back to what Molly said… Years ago at my place of work, someone stuck a Good Housewife’s Guide on the corkboard. From the 50s, it was advised that a wife tidy up the house before hubby returned home from a gruelling day at the office (what about her gruelling day with four kids and ringer washing machine?!), put on makeup, put the children out of sight. Once home, she should see him seated, remove his shoes and fetch a drink. Er, who wrote this stuff? My guess is a man =)
Seriously, both men and women should be attentive (if not intuitive) to their significant others needs. My dh is a pretty good listener. And if he doesn’t hear what I’m trying to say, I say it louder.
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